So Many Things Unclear, So Many Things Unknown

This semester, as you have read about, has been a complete whirlwind. When I came back from Orlando to begin my senior year I honestly did not imagine half of the things that happened would happen. But through the ups and downs, I have grown immensely from all of it.

Yet, I can't help but feel like so many other things are unclear and unknown.

With about six weeks left of the fall semester, I am beginning to truly think about what I am going to do after college. Do I stay in Lynchburg and work at Liberty? Do I begin the search for jobs in New York and figure out where I'd like to live? Where do I really stand with my employment with Disney? Which professor do I ask to write me a letter of recommendation for the master's program? These are all questions that I need to seek answers to, and sooner rather than later is preferred.

I am a planner, I always have been. I was voted "most organized" two years in a row in elementary school superlatives, I knew where I wanted to go to college and was already accepted before anyone in my class got their top 10 list finalized, and it is very rare that I go anywhere without my planner book. Is that a problem? Not in my opinion. However, sometimes it does make me have "tunnel vision" where I don't see what's to my right or my left since I'm so focused on just moving forward. Could that be what is making so many things unclear and unknown? I'm still figuring that out. I'm looking for all the signs and opportunities possible, at least I hope I am.

There are, as of this post, 194 days until I walk across the commencement stage. Less than 200 days for me to find out what my future holds and where I am going to be. Am I scared? I'd be lying if I said I wasn't. Am I excited? Most definitely. This heart full of love has some things to clear up, and that is starting now.

Have you been too much on your own?
So many things unclear
So many things unknown.
In my life
There are so many questions and answers
That somehow seem wrong
In my life
There are times when I catch in the silence
The sigh of a faraway song
And it sings
Of a world that I long to see
Out of reach
Just a whisper away
Waiting for me!
"In My Life"- Les Miserables